Saturday 12th January

Well, I made it through the first work week of 2013.

I did take it fairly easy despite having a lot of work to do.  It was hard to be enthused.

So, what else has been happening in my little, teeny, weeny world?

Let's see.

Hmmm, body pump class. Yep.

Lots of walks. Yep.

Lots of sleep.  NOPE.

We have had very hot weather and the hot nights make it hard to sleep.  We don't have the cooler on during the night because some prima donna is such a light sleeper that the noise will keep waking her up.  Plus the same prima donna is anal about electrical fan thingies being on at night in case of an electrical fault.  Same prima donna can't tolerate cool air blowing on her.  

Recently, however, the aforementioned prima donna conceded to allow the window to be open during the night.  Normally she does not allow this as there is no fly wire in the house and spiders crawl in and mosquitoes do as well but even she could not handle an airless room on some hot nights.  No spiders or mosquitoes entered the bedroom so her fears were, as usual, completed unfounded.

Anyway, the nights have been so hot that I have been sweating madly and waking up.  Then I do one of two things.  Either I lay awake for two or three hours or I spend the remainder of the night in a semi awake mode and wriggle around non stop.

Honestly, I don't know why I bang on about having crap sleep. I am sure half the population suffer the same thing.   At least one thing I never do when I wake up in the odd hours of the night is lie in bed and think about anything negative.  I just close my eyes and wait for sleep the best that I can.  Usually I think of nice things and hope that the thoughts take me into a place that is almost sleep.   Meditation has certainly helped with that.

When I have second rate sleep I always end up teary and anxious for a while.  Today was a rotten day for that and I muddled my way around it all.  I asked my son if he ever felt anxious or depressed.

Son: Nope

Me: What about angry?

Son: Of course. (with a "well duh I am a teenager mum" look on his face)

Me: What do you do when you get angry?

Son: Watch a movie.  Play games.  Whatever.

Me: Really? Just like that? (I was a bit impressed he had a strategy)

Son: Yeah, I don't dwell on it. What's the point. (stating the obvious)

Me: Really?  Are you sure I brought you up?  You handle things so well.

Son: Yep, thanks.

Me: Maybe I should bring myself up.

Son: Yep.

I need to take the same attitude of my fifteen year old son.  Just watch a movie.  Play a game.  Read a book.  Lighten up.  Be human.

What else?

All is going well with my niece living with us.  We talk a lot each night.  We talk when walking together.  We talk when sitting at the kitchen table and playing on our lap tops.  We just talk, talk and talk.  Today I asked K if he was feeling a bit neglected now that my niece had moved in but he reassured me that he was fine.

This morning I met up with the Oxfam girls and we are having our first training walk next week.  We decided to buy team tops and pink was the deciding colour.  My idea of pink is a soft pale kind of thing but the only pink tops available were of a lurid bubble gum shade.  And, since some prima donna (er, who me?) refuses to wear blue it seems that lurid pink now our team colour.

This year we have a completely different approach to training.  Having done it twice we think we have it worked out.  Lots of hills and steps.  Not so many long walks.  Daily gym exercise.  All muscle building.  That's my spare time and social life sorted until April 22nd.  Then after the walk I shall be totally depressed heading into the cold months and find myself back at therapy.  Yep, I know the routine now.

Tonight we went to our usual burger place and this time we took Mr Benny with.  He was so happy to be out with us and K took a photo of Mr B, S and myself.  It's such a nice photo I think.  Just looks very natural.

The look in my son's eyes is so playful.

Just like Mr Benny.

Ciao
LC