Another Day

Poor S is sick at home today. Nasty chest cough that kept me awake through the night and of course kept him awake as well. So it was decided he could stay home from school rather than sit in class coughing and spreading bugs. Got to work at about lunchtime and stared at the alarming amount of paperwork that had been dumped on the computer keyboard. I much prefer coming into work first thing in the morning otherwise I am just not in the mood for it. Anyway, toiled away mindlessly before deciding I had to get home and have dinner and stuff. I am leading somewhere with this dreary blurb. I stopped at Southland and picked up some tickets for S and K to go to see Deep Purple and Status Quo in a few weeks. Unfortunately it is on a Sunday night so I do think that S will be a bit tired at school the next day. I bought the tickets as S specifically asked if he could go and I thought it would be a good thing for him. It is unlikely that Deep Purple will still be rocking on in ten years time. Also picked up the Harry Potter DVD which was just out yesterday.

However, due to the purchase of the tickets, I have decided that the towels for the new bathroom are definitely on hold. Just cannot justify spending money on them yet. So I will wait a few more weeks. In fact, I might wait until the mid year sales as that really is a good time to buy some things.

Really feel I have to mention the "I" word. Ironing. Yes, the ironing monster has arrived on time and in full force. I sorted it this morning into piles which kind of made me feel a bit better about tackling it. Is there no end to it? Not likely. I will look at it in detail tonight. I think.

S is still in his pyjamas and has been watching Tintin all day long so I figure he must be feeling pretty average to not even bother to get off the couch. I cannot help but notice that lots of coloured foil paper is on the coffee table which tells me that he has probably been eating Easter eggs in large quantities. I am jealous.

First thing first though. Cup of green tea and then a 12 km bike ride for me.

Um, then the ironing.

Ciao

LM

Memories

Well, decided to do something constructive tonight as I am not walking at the moment until I feel a bit better. Have had about the worst period/pmt in years along with a rather horrible tummy ache. So, I decided to sort through S's baby clothes which were stored on top of our wardrobe. Took the boxes down and it just felt like yesterday that I put them up there. Took out all his sweet little clothes and bibs. His first pair of shoes, the clothes he came from hospital in. I could remember where each piece came from and could still smell that baby smell on them. Decided, however, everything needed a wash before I repacked and stored it as it did look a bit tired. Also found a box of toys that he played with a lot. Not really sure about cleaning them though as it may have to be a handwash job. Plus, there is something rather sweet about seeing his dribble marks on everything.

Had a bit of a boring Sunday as I had to lie up in bed with some sort of tummy bug. I hate being sick as it is so boring. Just lying around and waiting to get better is not my idea of fun really. Had to drag myself into work and plodded pretty much all day. Left early as, quite frankly, I was a waste of space.

Made a concious effort to totally chill out tonight. Resisted the urge to do any exercise or anything. Made myself relax. Think I am up to a walk in the morning though.

Am looking forward to C coming down and staying. It should be like a breath of fresh air for me. I hope she gets to just relax and take stock of things. I know things are not easy for her. That girl really deserves more good things to happen to her.

Anyway, I must go and clean up the bits and pieces I have emptied all over the floor of the lounge room.

Sleep well.

Ciao

LM

My Bike

I love my bike. My beautiful black boys bike. It is so sturdy and strong with shining chrome on it. I have a basket in front of the handlebars and one on the pack rack. It is such a nice looking bike with the black, shiny paint and decorative transfers. I like the white tipped mudguard at the back and the smooth black one on the front of the bike. I have to really lift my right leg high to clear the basket at the back and am thankful for being tall. Unfortunately I cannot get off it whilst it is going as the swing my leg back over the basket is asking for an embarassing fall. When I pedal it, the movement is so big and quiet except for the ticking of the gears when I stop pushing the pedal. It is such a lovely bike to ride on long journeys, so cruisy and forgiving over bumps and rattles. The seat is a brooks leather sprung saddle and so comfortable. No-one else rides a bike like mine. This bike has had a long life. It is about 50 years old and I like to think about who had it before, who rode it and used it all the time and the one day just got rid of it. Were it not for K deciding to restore it my bike would be rusting away down the rubbish tip. Any clear weather day I try to take it out for a 15 minute ride to just enjoy it.

Ciao

LM

Blah Blah Blah

Went to K's Aunt's funeral yesterday and it just confirmed that I am going to die one day. Funerals always do that. Just another reminder of our mortality. The place was at some newish place in Frankston and was like a conference centre or something. There, in this huge room of maroon chairs, were about 10 of us saying goodbye to this sweet old lady. I was sitting there thinking "I don't want to be here" and all the "where is my life going" thoughts raced through my head. The place was so sterile that even the toilets were these wierd push button things that sealed you inside and played elevator music whilst you sat on the toilet. Talk about purpose built.

Had the most awful sleep last night. Am restless and have so many things on my mind that I cannot seem to sort out very well. Not sure what to do about anything. Maybe just put things on the backburner.

Tonight, hooray, hooray, I am catching up with my lovely Hampton High buddies at our usual watering hole. I think catching up with them will help soothe my head. It just makes me feel happy when we get together and chitter chat without any agenda. Tonight I am driving as no drinking - also K is working around the corner and I will drop S off at about 7.30. Also means I don't have to drive home with B as I hate feeling I have to chat all that way and also leave when he wants to instead of when I want to. I have feeling obliged to anyone like that.

Sunday K is working so S will probably spend the day at a friend's house. I think I will just mosey around the house and go for a bike ride. Have some time to myself. Maybe ride down to the beach. Saturday is a day at the hairdressers and then a couple of hours shopping down at Elsternwick. I really need to do some things around the house. I know what has to be done but getting it done is a bit hard sometimes.

I better get back to work - not that I really feel like it today. I am so out of sorts, I need to get back on track.

Ciao

LM

Back to Routine

Well, finally a moment or two on my own to write a few uninteresting things. Holiday - well that went well but I am so glad to be back into my little routine of life. This is the only picture of me on the beach. The weather was so lovely and the view out to sea gorgeous. Unfortunately the view behind of all the big buildings was a bit ugly.

Tonight we went into the city to see the fish on the Yarra River and just to see what was happening really. The atmosphere was great. So many people just milling around and watching all sorts of amazing entertainment. It was like being in Europe really. Just that lovely holiday feel about it all. Although, I did say to S and K that it felt like something was about to happen but it never did. A sort of build up to - well - nothing really. There were some really astonishing perfomers and some of the ideas that people come up with for entertainment were impressive and indicated great imagination. Especially the gymnastics mixing with art.

So, now that I am back to work, home and all other routine things I can feel much more relaxed and in fact I feel quite invigorated after the holiday. I love routine. It keeps my head calm and my mind focussed and makes me feel safe and in control. When I get out of routine I am so agitated. A bit sad really.

I am too tired to finish the tonight. I will work on it when I get more time.

Sleep well.

LM

Busy Day

Mowed back lawn.
Weeded back garden.
Did some cooking.
Wore no make-up.

And

And

And

Finished ALL THE IRONING. Every little piece of it.

Yes.

Now I am going to bed - I have earnt it.

Ciao

LM

Avoiding Things That Must Be Done

I wonder if anyone else has this problem. The problem being "avoiding things that must be done". Today I knew that I had to sort washing and stuff and also start packing some stuff up in S's room but instead I cleaned the bird cage, cleaned out the fridge and pantry and fiddled around in the garage cleaning my bike and looking up on the mezzanine floor in boxes. Plus I rang my brother and chatted to him for a while. I often do other things to avoid doing things I should get stuck into. Oh, I do know I must pack the suitcases or I am in the shit on Tuesday!

Interestingly enough, I was like this at school. I would have an assignment that had to be done by a certain date and I would do it the absolute last minute. I would think and think about what I had to do and agonise over it and then just do it the night before and get good marks for it. When I went back to study for a year when I was 28 I noticed that my study habits had not changed. Even at work I will do really, really important things right at the last minute. It is almost as if the extreme pressure just brings out the best in me. Personally I think most people are like that.

Finally got my legs waxed today and feel just so smooth and fresh. It was just a relief to know that when I go up to QLD I can go on the beach hair free. I honestly do not know how those girls do a brazillian wax. I mean I have a shower just before I go there but it is just so wierd lying there getting a highly personal wax. They don't seem to mind. And she was so quick it was almost painless. Except, funnily enough, on the top of my feet and ankles it is just agony. Maybe because there is no fat under the skin. Who knows, who cares - I am hair free.

Hair is a funny thing. I mean it is just so acceptable to have a glorious head of hair yet if there is a skerrick of hair peeping outside of a pair of bathers people freak. I remember when I went overseas for the first time I was told that European girls never shave and I thought "oh okay, I guess that is very liberating". Well, it is an urban myth. The girlies in Europe are hair free and totally fantabulous. And that was 12 years ago so you can imagine now, with the never ending strive for perfection, how gorgeous the girls are. When we got to Denmark I think K's mouth had to be nailed shut after seeing all the Danish girls all suntanned in their teeny weeny skimpy shorts. Hmmmm, I must admit I did feel a bit of a frump!

I made S help me clean the bird cage. He whined at first and then just got into it. I had to teach him how to clean and hold the cloth. I remember my mum teaching me how to clean as I can tell you it did not come naturally. I am about to get him to vacuum the wooden floor tonight as I think he is about at that age. He really is a lazy boy - I was the same. Not overly eager to please although he will do the right thing if I ask.

Well, I have made S dinner, had my dinner and cleaned the kitchen. K is away for the weekend so it is time to make myself a nice cup of tea - green of course.

Hot day tomorrow - nice.

Ciao and very sweet dreams.

LM

Sunny Friday

Had a delightful day today. Dropped S off to school and then just did my own thing and enjoyed the perfect weather. S got his braces off and looks so grown up now with his teeth. After I picked him up from school at 2.30 we went to Southland to Smiggle and somehow S conned me into spending money on textas of all things. Although he did ask for a diary so that he could write about his holiday next week which was good to see. And the textas were scented so I guess they were a bit special. I hate a mouthful of S's milkshake and was unwell in the car on the way home. Really, I should have listened to S when he said "Mum, you will be sick if you drink that". Then he said "I told you so" in the car. Hmmmm. too bad, it was almost worth it.

Now I am sitting at home psyching myself up to get stuff ready to take to Queensland. I hate packing and unpacking. Really, ideally, I would like to just go up there and buy what I need but that is not very economical.

I am tired today - need to go to bed early.

Actually I need to eat. It has just dawned on me that I am starving. Mmmmm, looks like tofu toast is on the menu.

Ciao for now.

LM

Funny Things Children Say.

The other day when I got into the car after picking up S from school after care, he said to me "Have you heard about Pinochet the dictator from Chile who killed so many people?". I stared in amazement and asked him to repeat it which he did. We discussed Pinochet and the regime that he created in as much detail as I could with my limited knowledge. S found it hard to believe that a man like him had been allowed to return the the country and was not put on trial and killed for what he did. Funny things for an 8 year old to say. But at his school is a fantastic roving teacher who takes classes when other teachers are away sick and he tells children great and fantastic historical facts that they otherwise would probably never learn. And S is right into it. I can always tell when he has had Mr R as there will always be a pertinent comment. We have had things about Mt Everest explorers, trench warfare in WWI, Hitler and so many other things. In fact this morning K was explaining the purpose of the Queen being head of state of Australia and how her being there prevented bad people getting into power like Hitler or Pinochet. Then S goes, oh yes, and like Libya where they have Gadafi who is a dictator. K said "ah, yeah - like Gadafi" and was quite surprised. Hmmmm, I must look for some good books for S to read to continue his interest in history. I can see his mind ticking over. He is into books now and reading as profusely as I did at that age. Plus I read to him at night and after I read to him at night he reads his book and then turns on the cd player to listen to another book he has. K was never a big reader but I am pleased to see that S is as reading gives such pleasure and transports you to another world.

I am getting more into jogging now that my leg seems to be improving. I can feel myself toning up and although my clothes feel the same, I have put on a bit of weight which is good. I feel good as well, nice and fit and clear headed. I am happy.

Holiday is coming up soon. QLD - the land of frizzy hair. I think a hair elastic will be my best friend for 6 days. Back to work.

Ciao LM

Autumn sunny weekends

Have had a very relaxing Saturday and Sunday. Rode my lovely bike - which now has two gorgeous black wire baskets on it. One at the front and one on the pack rack. I love riding it to the supermarket and loading it up with food. I never, ever wear a helmet which is a bit naughty but it feels very nice to have the wind in my hair.

I took S and his friend to The Children's Garden at the Botanical Gardens on Sunday where they got totally soaked to the skin playing under the fountain. S was dripping with water and thoroughly enjoying himself. We had a picnic and both of them ate so much I am surprised they could move. After that we went to the Shrine of Rememberance and had a long look there. S said to me that he felt sad when he looked at the books and books of so many names of people who were killed in WWI. Downstairs in the crypt was a giant Australian flag from Changi prison and I would have explained it to S more but his friend is Japanese and I felt that maybe it was better that I did not discuss it as I do not know what he knows or whatever. Just did not feel appropriate so I said to S we could look it up on the internet. But it was interesting that the two of them stood listening very seriously to the Last Post being played and I thought how interesting it is that these days we put all that behind us.

Yesterday I did lots of weed pulling and garden bed raking and am very sunburnt on my arms. Today was also so sunny that I did get a second dose of the sun and I am feeling a bit tired.

The work on the house is very slowly coming together and the storage cupboard (ex toilet) is almost ready to be used. Now the office is going to be painted, recarpeted and have some built in furniture put in and we can call it complete. K went out and bought a laptop for work yesterday and I said how disgusting it was that we now have THREE computers in the house. Talk about E-house. K hates computers - believe it or not.

I know I have more to write up - but too tired really.

Ciao

LM

Was I Ever a Little Girl

I am wondering if I was ever a little girl doing little girl things. I think hard and it seems as though I was always a grown up. That is the trouble with being an adult, you so easily forget the pleasures of being a child. I remember doing lots of things in my childhood, but I cannot grasp the feeling of being so small and carefree. Sometimes though, when I catch up with HH friends I do feel 16 again. In fact we all feel that way so I guess that is close to it.

We moved into a house in Hampton when I was about 12. I remember the bathroom had a claw foot bath and one of those water heaters you had to light every morning to heat the water. I swear it looked like Mr Squiggles rocket and when you lit it the whole bathroom shook. The top of my right hand and lower arm had no hair on it after I lit it as a flame would shoot up my arm when I lit the pilot light. The bonus of it was that the water was hot for as long as that rocket was lit. You could have the most glorious long baths or showers. The bath had a tin surround on the section where the shower was. The hot water for the bath came out of a long thin copper pipe so you had to be careful not to touch it as it was scorching hot.

I do love old fashioned things. I do have the most delightful stove that we bought out of the Trading Post for just $100. It had only been used once or twice and then disconnected and put into storage for about 50 years. However we did have to get it converted to run it from Town gas to Natural gas and that took about 45 phone calls to find a person who could do that. We don't have an electric kettle - we use the stove - with an enamel jug that came from Denmark from family friends and is about 60 years old. I actually sold a 2 year old stove to put this one in. I use this one more than I have used anything and have cooked a full on meal for 8 in it. It makes the most amazing roasts in it and fantastic cakes. But it really does require a bit of skill as it is not fan forced and is in fact a very "fast" oven. You have to be careful what size pans to use and where to place them in the oven. I have had to use old cook books to work out the best way to use it. Everyone thought we were wierd when we bought it but I like the fact that it has history and it acknowledges people since gone. Anyway, who cares - I love it. K would like and old fridge, but I had to say no to that.

Later this year we will change the kitchen a bit by replacing the jarrah bench top with a lovely mottled green laminex finished off in the 1960's style of a steel edge. The doors will also be changed to be more old fashioned. It is fun and different so why not.

Went for walk tonight and feel good and after this I will be doing some tv watching and exercises. Got a long week ahead of me so need to keep active.

Sleep well.

LM